"Night Owl" - Tangle #4 and a Whole New Series in the Works!!! =0)

"Night Owl" - Tangle #04    2.5" x 3.5"      Graphite, Colored Pencil and Ink on Acrylic Paper (ACEO)

$25 - Email me if Interested

This little Owl stole my heart as soon as he made his appearance. And I knew that I immediately wanted to make a series of woodland creatures in this style, so as of now I am currently working on work #02 in the series, a playful little bear cub, who's trying so hard to climb over a tree that's a mite bit taller than he is. As for this Owl though, he's got a wild side - a little bit of mischeviousness to him that I just adore. It's as if as soon as the sun sets his playful side comes out and little mousies beware!

I hope you are having fun being your own little playful selves as well! And oh how I'm loving this newfound LOVE for pen and ink - I think it rather suits me, especially when color is involved. =0) I'd love to know what you think or what woodland animals you would like to see from me next. And thanks for not giving up on me - you have no idea what that means to this weary soul - it's like the elixir of LOVE and LIFE and JOY all mixed up into one sweet tonic, and I thank you heartily for that. Have a wonderful day, my friends, and stay inspired! You have no idea how much you have helped keep me inspired yourselves!

"Broken Hearted" - Tangle #02

"Broken Hearted"  - Tangle #02     2.75" x 2.75"     Ink and Graphite on Illustration Board

Already I'm starting to get the hang of this Zentangle® thing. On Day #01, I noticed that I made FAR too many teeny, tiny spaces with all my lines, which, had I been working on a larger scale, would have made for an absolutely fantastic and interesting piece. However, when it's the size of a mere ACEO, yeah, not so much... So for Tangle #02 I decided to create larger spaces to work within, to allow myself enough area to really get in there and create some fabulous patterns and you know what? I liked it - A LOT! It was so much more fun this way to create each individual space, as they each really had the chance to be able to get developed instead of just barely getting started before having to move on to a new beat because the lines had already changed. So I guess I already learned something new, and it's only just the beginning... I can't wait to see where this takes me in the future!

"Trudging Along" - A Colored Pencil and Conte Pencil Drawing

"Trudging Along"     Colored Pencil and Conte Pencil on Bristol Board

Sorry, I know this isn't the best picture ever, but I'm so incredibly tired and just wanted to get this up here - and in all honesty, it's just a picture off my phone. But If you like this piece and are interested in Purchasing this Original Work of Art, Please feel free to Email Me Via My "About Me" Section on the Right Side Panel. Thanks! And Have a Great Day!

It's been more and more difficult and far more painful than I ever imagined it would be at this point for me to get out my paints and brushes these last few days, or really this entire last month. I keep promising myself that I'll try my hardest to get everything set up so I can work on some projects, but my body just isn't havin' it right now. 

And it's become more than just a little bit frustrating by now - after all it's my best way of blowing off emotional steam,  and since this flare hit last month I've had plenty of steam to fuel a freight car right now. But like I said before, this time I'm choosing to fight this with all I got, and so away go the paints for a small time (I'm still praying and holding out hope that this won't last too long) and out come the drawing tools. 

I've been working with colored pencils, Conte crayons, and oil pastels, not to mention plain old graphite the last few days, and I'm just trying to get in as much practice as possible. I'd actually forgotten how much fun just the practice of drawing and, well, practicing in general, really can be and I'm actually having a blast with this! 

Finally, I'm starting to make some progress here, with God's help. I'm learning how to make the best with what I have, though I have a long road ahead of me before I get that one down. =0)  Rather than just letting myself get depressed with what I can't do right now, I've been praying that God would open my eyes to see the things I CAN do instead, & I have to admit it sure does make a huge impact on your life. Everything seems to be so much happier this way, the days seem brighter and more full of hope, and I feel way less defeated as well . It's way more fun when you can find a way of looking at things as if the glass were half full rather than it always being half empty, or so I seem to be learning this these last few weeks. It's quite a change of pace for me but I'm really enjoying it and I can't wait to see what it leads to! God bless you and have a great day!

"Windswept" - A Portrait Drawing in All It's Stages =)

"Windswept"     5" x 5.5"     Graphite on Paper

I started this drawing years ago, back in 2009 while I was taking a drawing class at LMC, the community college in my area. Our teacher had us create 3 finished works every week in our sketchbooks, trying to get us to really get into the habit of drawing, as well as proving to us that the more you draw the better you get. I loved that practice, and honestly I don't know why I haven't kept it up. After all, your drawing skills or lack thereof can be critically important when you're trying to paint things realistically, and like most things, and as I said before, the more you practice the better you get!

With my pain mounting and growing more and more intense each and every day, painting just hasn't quite been in the works for me these last few weeks. I felt a bit better earlier today, but by tonight things had taken a turn for the worse. My pain level is back in the 8-9 range, albeit sporadically, waxing and waning, growing more intense and then loosening up. It's honestly quite terrifying for me and my family, as we just don't want to face another full blown flare right now. I thought I'd be better by June. I thought my pain would go down so quickly as the weather warmed up that I would feel pretty amazing right now, and would be able to live with less intense drugs to ease my pain. But not only are my hopes shattered, I am actually facing what might be the beginning of another miserable flare, and I'm scared. I'm just so scared.

So in an attempt to get my mind off of how much I hurt and how much I fear what is going on in my body and how it's taking such a deep toll on my life and my family, I decided to pick this drawing back up and start making some changes to it in order to make it more realistic. The finished version is the one at the top, and I included two different stages below in order to capture the progression of it from start to finish. The funny thing is that I actually like how it looks in each stage it went through, and I love the fact that even though there's only one original drawing, I can still make prints of the others if I so desire, or if someone wants to purchase one. That's pretty stinkin' awesome

So here's how it looked back in 2009, in a much more simplified style. I was attempting to create a feeling of mystery within this piece, and I just love her piercing eyes, though they are far from perfect. Apparently my skills have increased since then, which is a bit odd since I haven't drawn much in the time between then and now. I guess that painting increases your skills in drawing in the same way that drawing improves your paintings. I never knew it worked like that, but it's pretty remarkable how that works. =)

Although she is flawed, I still like the overall feeling of this piece. Mysterious, filled with longing, and quite intense.

 

 

As I went along with my drawing, I wanted to add in more features that make it seem more life-like. All the little subtleties of soft highlights and gentle shadows that make up the smooth surface of a woman's face. Her eyes grew dark in this version somehow, making her a bit too daunting and formidable for my taste, as if she hungers for revenge. Or rather than revenge, perhaps she is filled with sorrow, her eyes cloudy and filled with anguish. She looks as though she is holding back as much as possible, but despite her efforts, she is barely keeping in her tears. Soon they will overflow into great pools of sorrow. I love the open-ended story here. I'm sure you can come up with your own.

I am glad my Ty pointed out how aggressive her eyes appeared to be in this one, so that I could soften them up and try to retain some of the mystery and gentle intensity. I know that's quite the oxymoron, but it works. I saw it immediately after he said it, and had he not pointed it out for me, this one would have been THE final product. I love how Ty is my greatest critic. He's so truthful and sometimes painfully honest, and if I handle his critiques well and use his advise to help me grow as an artist, I always end up with a better piece in the end. Like I've said before on here, sometimes you just need an extra set of eyes to show you what you're missing.

I would love if you could pray for me and my family right now. If this flare ends up REALLY flaring up, I just don't know how we'll all handle it. I suppose we'll get through it one day at a time, but I would love to spare my boys the hurt that they experienced during my last flare when it looked like mommy didn't love them because I was so crippled I couldn't play with them or even hold them because of how my nerve receptors were over-firing whenever anyone touched me, producing screaming pain that left me weeping. Please pray for wisdom for my doctor tomorrow, who I'm hoping to get an urgent appointment with to get a pain relieving shot. It's one of the only methods that actually kicks my pain down enough for me to function. And I would love if you could pray for wisdom for our family too, as we will be struggling to figure everything out if things go south.

God willing, this will pass before it gets any worse. Thank you, my friends, for caring and praying and just all that you do to support me through this. Even just the fact that you are there, listening to me vent and open up my heart to you means more to me than you could possibly imagine. So thank you. Thank you for everything. =)

"Weary" - A Portrait Drawing

"Weary"     4" x 5.25"     Graphite on Paper

After all this time of having a blog, I can't believe I've never posted even one of my drawings! Truth is, I absolutely love to draw! In fact, some of my favorite memories revolve around drawing. Like when I was just a little girl and my mom bought me a sketchbook -I loved to spend my afternoons curled up with it in my lap or laying on the ground in front of me while I would lay tummy-side down on the floor with my feet dangling up in the air, as most little girls like to do, and I would fill it up with drawing after drawing. Placing my hopes and dreams on the pages - imaginations of different worlds and fairytale lands, as well as observations of our own world around me.

I'm still a sucker for a brand new sketchbook, and I know I always will be. To me they are filled with all the possibility in the world wrapped up so neatly in their clean, crisp pages. I love the smell, the feel, the weight of it in my hands. I love running my fingers over the untouched pages, dreaming up ways to fill it with life. Perhaps over the next few weeks I can share some of my imaginations with you, in order to give you an idea of how I like to express myself with this lovely medium. I truly hope you will enjoy this different aspect of my artistry. =)

And I won't lie, part of the reason I want to post my drawings right now is simply because of how awful I've been feeling. I've been trying so hard to get myself into the studio lately, but I just can't do it. My fibro has taken another turn for the worse these last few weeks, and it's been especially hard on me and my family. My days are filled with exhaustion, where no matter how much I sleep at night, which lately has been in the 12-14 hr. range, I still fall asleep multiple times a day, drifting off immediately when I sit down, and almost dozing off even while I'm standing. My poor husband has been left having to carry the load all by himself all over again, and it hurts me to see him struggle so as a result of my sickness. I've had a significant and steady increase in my pain as well, which means that my work is for naught - my meds need to be going back up. Worst of all is that fact that I've had a greatly lessened ability to watch and play with my boys. It breaks my heart!!! And it scares me so very, very much. I don't want this for my life. No one would.

I honestly thought I'd be so much better by now, but these last few weeks have been such a hard punch to my own perception of how things are. I finally realized that I've been in denial - which manifested itself mostly in my attempts to lower my medications because I believed I was finally doing okay. But I really wasn't. In fact, I've been far from okay. I've only been capable of watching my boys two full days a week, and I pay for it so badly that the next week Grandma has to watch them for me because I have to recover. And now we've had two weeks in a row that I haven't been able to care for them. It's awful! So I hope you can understand why I haven't been around much these last few weeks, neigh, these last few months. I keep thinking I'm doing so well, but in truth, I'm just not. But I will not give in to hopelessness or despair! I know God has a plan for me even in this - that He is teaching me what love and long suffering and patience truly are. He is also trying to teach me gratitude, and how to be encouraging and graceful to others, even if I'm feeling at my worst. I have so very much more to learn, but I know with God's strength He will lead me in the path of righteousness. Now all I have to do is follow.

So if you don't see me around much in the next few weeks, I am truly sorry - trust me, I wish with all my heart that I could feel well enough to paint and keep up with my blog. I will try my hardest though to push through this little flare and to get back up on my feet. And until then, I shall draw. =)

And just so you know, I do commissions! If you're interested in purchasing an original portrait from me of you, your family, or your sweet little baby, why not email me and let me know. They make wonderful presents for loved ones, whether for an anniversary, a wedding, a birthday, and for just about any occasion or celebration you can think of. And I love making them, so you know I will put plenty of time and love and attention into it, creating the perfect piece for you, whether it's intended to be a gift for someone you love or a gift for yourself. =)

Just Some Random Mindless Doodling & A Tip =)

This may look silly to you, but  I've rediscovered a lost love of mine recently - random and totally mindless doodling! Somehow I forgot all about this wonderful form of art, and I fell in love all over again during my first class at the Chronic Pain Clinic. I've never been one to sit still for more than two seconds or even keep my mouth quiet for very long either, and so to keep myself sane and somewhat stationary during class while I listened (and I DO listen mind you!) I doodled. I've done it since I was young - some of my favorite ideas I've ever created are nestled away amongst my high school and college notebooks, waiting to be found again one day. Seriously, some of them are definite keepers - they seem to cry out from the pages like they are just waiting to be made into something more grand than a lonely little sidenote on a lined piece of college-rule paper. In fact, I think that this little owl might need to be made into something a little more grand, though he may need a little love first. But yeah, I like this one.. It could be a painting, right?

Okay, back on subject silly.... So freeing and fun is this little "sport" of mindless doodling that I think I'm hooked all over again. It makes me want to buy yet ANOTHER special little journal just so I always have something with me. Back in middle school I had an amazingly talented friend who was an artist and who doodled all the time. And when I say doodled, boy did this girl ever doodle. She doodled everything imaginable, including the names of all of our friends into meaningful word art that perfectly described each person. I'm still dying to try that someday - I'll just have to add it to the list... =)

I'll have to post some of my figure sketches from class soon if I get the chance - they're not that amazing - you have to remember, I was really listening, but even more I was trying to make sure my teachers knew I was listening, so I had to start and stop mid stride so often I'd lose momentum. But still, they were fun and I'll be doing them for the next few weeks until this course is over.

MY TIP FOR THE DAY - How to still do art even when you don't really have time for it
If it's at all possible for you, I highly suggest trying to keep a small journal of any kind that you can record all your random thoughts and ideas for future works in it throughout the day wherever you are. It only takes a second or two (okay, maybe like 3 minutes or something...) to draw out and write down your ideas before they are forgotten and lost forever. I am always forgetting things so I have many of these artistic journals - my scheduler, a random notebook by my bed, my pain class notebook and every other school notebook or assignment, and of course, various actual FOR REAL sketchbooks.

The notebook by the bed though is a BIGGIE for me!!! It's so great to be able to have a journal beside you in arms reach, especially when you have random thoughts pop up in your head right as you're starting to drift off, whether it's just something everyday and boring like remembering an appointment you've forgotten about, or if it's something more creative and exciting like establishing the entire layout for your next new masterpiece or coming up with a killer idea for a new series. Can you see why I love having a journal by my bed every night and why this can be one of your greatest tools as an artist?! Ooh, and if you're not sold yet, it's also great for trying to capture the fleeting beauty of a dream you just had so you can try to recreate it as a work of art. But just don't forget something to write and draw with, or oh man, will you be frustrated at 4am!

So anyways, another thing you can do if you're more of a painter is you can find a simple little journal and a little set of paints (watercolor, guache or acrylic work amazingly well, and you don't even need any fancy cigar-box sets to hold them in, plus they dry super duper fast - though I have to admit, those cigar-box easels are pretty awesome and I totally want to outfit the one my mother-in-law Karla gave me soon so I can have one too - I mean, come on, they fit on a trypod so you don't even have to hold it! How awesome is that?! But if you need to be a bit more frugal, why not go with a Tupperware box for your paints and brushes or a Ziplock baggie or pencil tote like the ones in elementary school for your pencils, or even an old pill bottle filled with water so you can bring it with you just in case there's no water around - you know, reuse, reduce, recycle....  =) You may think I'm on a little too much pain meds, but trust me, the empty pill bottle actually works perfectly! It's because you can use the cap to pour a small amount of clean water in it to dab on your brush and then use the actual bottle for cleaning your brush between colors, and the best part is it doesn't leak! An old frosting tub works fantastic too! Or you could just save up and buy one of those cute little water color sets with the palette and water pocket built right in... =0)

So if you are feeling up to starting to try to get some more creative time in during your busy life, then look no further - a little art journal just might be the perfect thing for you. I know my mom even suggested that I myself do more drawing the other day anyways, so you'll actually probably be seeing some of my own works up here in a while - whether doodles, sketches, or true drawings with full detail I'm not sure, but I know drawing is going to start happening in this house a whole lot more often now, and all because my class rekindled this little fire in me for that. Gotta love it! It's just so random! 

Well anyways, I hope you're having a good time out there, that this post made sense (I am so tired I've literally been typing with only one eye open the ENTIRE time. For reals.), and that maybe today you will be extra inspired to go out and make something beautiful in this world. Good night my friends! And good morning to those of you across the world reading my blog - I love you all so much! God bless! =D